Marriage breaking apart, slightly irrational fear, because we are kinda managing significant libido differences(my fault), but the fear is still there.

It’s not like I’m only going to mess up my or my partners life, we have 2 kids as well and they’re going to be the ones suffering the most. So if i give up fighting/trying/putting in the effort or don’t even do it enough, ill be failing a rather big evolutionarily determined goal for any living being. Basically failing my main duty and one of the biggest reasons I’m still alive and somewhat functional adult.

I just overlay reasoning upon this fear, probably just suppressing it.

300, Mad max fury road, Fight club or anything from Warhammer 40k.

Though not for the deeper and hidden meanings in those, theres enough of trying to figure that out in day to day life.

Most of those just look awesome on simple surface level.